54.6 million kilometers. 460 cubic metres. 7 human beings. 5.1 years abroad. 66 days and counting until I set foot Earthside.

It's amazing what you miss. And what you don't.

To do list priority order:

1. Toilet paper. Proper gravity. (You simply cannot understand how fortunate you people are on this planet!)
2. Fill a shopping cart with every luxury item for sale at my local supermarket and consume them all in one weekend.
3. Rehabilitate lungs, skin, and eyes at the seaside.
4. Cold beer from a bottle. (No carbonated drinks in space. In a place that hot, the absence of lager was a unique torment.)
5. Indulgently write the rest of this diary exclusively in pencil. (Of all the things to endure in half a decade off-world, who'd've thought anyone would get... graphite withdrawal?)

Find the original contest instructions here.