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Huang Hai’s Bar and Grill,

Shadow Tree Tower,

City of Grendel,

Planet Beowulf,

September 1858 PD.


“You do realize this is probably the only establishment in Shadow Tree that allows smoking, don’t you?” Caspar Benton-Ramirez y Chou asked.

“That’s an exaggeration,” his son replied, tamping fresh tobacco into the bowl of his pipe. “Three quarters of the restaurants and bars in Grendel let you smoke.”

“Maybe, but not tobacco.”

“Which is frigging ridiculous.” Jacques Benton-Ramirez y Chou lit his pipe. “This isn’t the pre-cancer vaccine Dark Ages, and secondhand smoke from most of those other products is a lot more likely to affect your judgment.”

“I’m just saying that when I get home, your mom is going to take one sniff and know I’ve been out hobnobbing with you. And then she’s going to ask me why.”

“No,” Jacques replied. “She’s not going to ask why you’ve been hobnobbing with me. She’s going to ask why she wasn’t included. Or maybe she isn’t. She’ll know what we were hobnobbing about, Dad. Do you think she’ll want to open that can of worms?”

“Probably not,” Caspar sighed, looking down into his beer stein.

“Dad, this is stupid.” Jacques’s frustrated anger was evident. “It’s bad enough that Mom won’t even record a letter to Alley, but she says that since Alley and—of course!—Alfred ‘went out of their way to not invite me’ to visit even now that Alley’s pregnant, they obviously don’t want to hear from her, anyway. I pointed out that she’s had a standing invitation for years, and her response was that if they don’t care enough to specifically invite her again, now of all times, they obviously never meant it seriously in the first place. She says she won’t ‘go crawling’ to them if that’s the way they feel about it. And now she flat out refuses to even discuss Alley with me!”

“You expected anything else?” His father looked up. “You think she doesn’t already know what you’d say? What you’ve already said more times than I can count?” He grimaced. “And I’ve agreed with you almost every time. But you’ve known your mother your entire life. Don’t tell me you’re surprised by any of this!”

“That it’s lasted this long? Yes, honestly.” Jacques shook his head. “I mean, I know she’s stubborn, and I know Alley’s stubborn. But this—!”

He looked like he wanted to spit on the floor, and Caspar snorted.

“Your mother and I have been consensually bonded for a long time, son, and I’ve never seen her this dug-in, either. But I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about it. You want my take on it?”

“Please,” Jacques said.

“All right, first, she’s genuinely unable to understand why Allison would have opted for monogamy, especially so early. But I doubt she’d have a problem with that if Alley had just stayed home and taken her proper place in the ‘family business.’ She didn’t. She’s not going to change her mind and come home, either, and your mom knows that. But she won’t—can’t—admit it to herself, and it’s not just stubbornness. That’s a big part of it, granted, but it’s also hurt. In her own mind, every single thing she’s ever said about Allison’s ‘mistakes’ is motivated by love. So when Alley rejected her ‘advice,’ she also rejected her. She rejected her mother’s love in favor of some yahoo from an upstart, nouveau riche star nation like Manticore.”

“Dad—!”

“I didn’t say Allison really did. I said that’s how your mom sees it, and it’s not something even I can discuss with her anymore. And because she blames Alfred for ‘luring’ Alley into monogamy and ‘locking her up’ off-world, she also blames him for Allison’s rejection of her. To be honest, though, I think another big part of the reason she’s dug in so strongly on this is fear.”

“Fear?”

“Jacques, you know exactly what those bastards did to Allison,” Caspar said grimly, “and I’ve been Planetary Vice President of the Anti-Slavery League for decades, so I know, too. We can’t lie to ourselves about it, however much we want to, but your mom doesn’t have our insight, and she’s never really admitted how horrible it was. Or how terrified she is, deep inside, that it might happen again. She can’t admit the fear without facing the reality, and without admitting the fear, she can’t admit that at least half her genuine anger stems from Alley’s refusal to stay home where the people who love her could keep her safe. Or that the real reason she’s pissed at you is that you’re one of the people who’s supposed to protect Alley here, and instead, you’re helping ‘put her at risk’ in the Star Kingdom!

“I’ve told her she needs counseling on this, but she just brushes me off, and she’s never done that before. That’s why I know how deep her refusal to grapple with it truly goes. And that’s also why, irrational as you and I both know it is, she resents the hell out of Alfred. She can’t accept Alley’s love for him—the fact that she chose him when your mom forced the issue—without admitting to herself what Alfred pulled Alley out of. As far as she’s concerned, you’re the one who really rescued her, when you got there with the assault shuttle. Again, because if she ever admits what Alfred did, she’ll have to truly confront what happened to Alley before he got there.”

“I hadn’t thought about it from that perspective,” Jacques said slowly.

“Well, that makes two of you,” Caspar said with a bitter smile. “Because she sure as hell hasn’t, either. Not with that first-class brain we both know she has, anyway. And I’m not surprised you haven’t thought about it, because the last thing your mother normally is is irrational, and this is as irrational as it gets.”

“What about you?” Jacques asked, sitting back and relighting his pipe.

“As far as I’m concerned, Alfred Harrington has an unlimited credit balance,” Caspar said simply. “I do know what he did, and that Alley’s probably safer in Manticore than here. And she and I exchange letters every couple of T-weeks.” His eyes were unhappy. “I really wish I’d accepted their invitation to visit, but it hurts your mom badly enough each time we just exchange letters. If I actually went, it’d be like she’s been deserted—abandoned—and disapproved of by everyone who ought to love her.”

“That’s ridiculous. Nobody’s ‘abandoned’ or ‘deserted’ her!”

“I didn’t say they had. But that’s exactly the way it feels to her. I hate it, almost as much as I hate her refusal to seek any counseling of her own, but I can’t find a way to change it. There has to be one. Whether she’s showing it right now or not, your mom loves Allison too much for there not to be a way. But I will be damned if I know what it is, Jacques.”


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